Betina Thygesen

My favorite mentor told me never to comment on an article when feeling angry and my husband did give me the same advise as we discussed yesterday’s article from the New York Times, “What’s eating our kids? Fears about bad foods”. This made me reconsider writing this, at least for a minute. Then I realized that although definitely moved by the article, I was not angry – there is a lot of thought provoking valuable points raised, but as a consequence of the way the material is presented, I felt personally attacked – without reason I realize after having read the article a few times over. I might not be the only one feeling like this, so here I go.

The article is presenting many parents as overzealous and obsessive, who with the best of intentions are creating an unhealthy aura around food, which leads their children to having eating disorders such as anorexia nervosa and bulimia, conditions that have been diagnosed in increasing numbers of adolescents and young people in the last two decades: ”legions of parents are vigilant about their children’s consumption of sugar, processed foods and trans fats. Many try to stick to an organic diet. In general, their concern does not stem from a fear of obesity – although that may figure into the equation – but from a desire to protect their families from conditions like hyperactivity, diabetes and heart disease, which they believe can be avoided or at least managed, by careful eating.”

So, I feed my children organic, whole foods. I never buy sodas, I strongly discourage transfats and processed foods, I do not own a microwave, and I would rather they snack on an apple, a handful of raw almonds and some dried figs than gummy bears and fruit roll ups. I do believe that their diet is protecting them from many future health conditions and I do believe that they are strong and balanced individuals. We have breakfast and dinner together EVERY day, we never go to a fast food restaurant and the children never want to buy foods at the school cafeteria, not even if I beg them when the content of the fridge is in need of a refill! Do we eat cake, popcorn, apple cider, and dessert? Of course (crème brulée is everybody’s favorite) this is not however considered food – but a treat.

Will they, now aged 9 and 11, as a consequence turn into obsessive-compulsive individuals when they grow into their teens as the article suggests? (This is where I feel personally attacked!)

At this point, where junk foods are sadly here to stay, we, as parents, school food providers, politicians, medical professionals etc., have a responsibility to educate ourselves and our children on what is really food, teach children how to cook, teach them how to set a table, how to enjoy eating, and how to feel part of the family as a community where food is enjoyed with the prime goal of nourishment. Adding a little love always makes the food tastes so much better!

In the article a young underweight preteen girl is reported seeing her doctor for bulimia. The doctor finds that there is nothing wrong with the girl; apart from the fact that she doesn’t like brown rice. She wants white rice and her mother is only serving brown.

Is the mother right or wrong?

I only serve brown rice my children like that. I also often make this side dish of roasted mushrooms, white and sweet potatoes that my son hates. I still make it and ask him to at least try a bite in case his taste buds changed from the last time he tried – he does and then helps himself to a piece of rye bread or leftover rice from the previous day to go with whatever else we are having. He is not underweight! Of course it is the parent who decides what is served. If the girl mentioned in the article is only ever offered brown rice – every day - there is a problem, (might it have nothing to do with the rice?)

Anger, guilt, stress, depression, and anxiety are well-known precursors for an eating disorder. Falling short of the setting of high expectations to physical appearance and academic achievements is a hard blow to any person’s self-esteem, especially preteens and adolescents. And taking about eating disorders, let’s not forget that this doesn’t only mean eating low calorie foods with the purpose of weighing nothing, it also indicates quite the contrary; eating an excess of food, often food like factory stuff, high in a number of stimulants that will help us forget at least for a second, until the next symptoms of cravings reappear. It seems to me that people in today’s society are severely deficient of Vitamin L (ove).

I agree with the article that we shouldn’t talk to our children about calories, but I disagree with the fact that we shouldn’t educate them on the potentially dangers of eating Oreos. This, I do not think, makes me “create an unhealthy aura around food”, on the contrary, I cherish food and I love eating. Next month we are celebrating both children’s birthdays. Their friends are coming and I am making the cake. I will not make a “granola cake”, and I will not have one made with a 3”, 5 bright colored icing either. I will make a cake like the one my mother made for me, like the one her mother made for her. With flour (whole wheat pastry), cream, eggs, sugar (maple syrup), fruit (organic), and (real) chocolate.

Healthcare costs and a number of diseases are the biggest threats to the American people and to America as a country. Considering that a third of the children born the same year as my daughter will likely develop diabetes II at some point in their lifetime forces us to ”serve our children organic whole foods and help them read and understand labels on cereal boxes and cans”. My clients often talk to me about their struggles of making their teenage children eat real food and I cannot help thinking that eating real, home cooked foods, should be a pleasure for everyone involved, never a struggle and a battle. This, I believe, is the price that we in the Western, developed, educated world pay for depending on convenience foods, often eaten in front of the TV, in the car, and without the company of the people we love. 

http://www.nytimes.com/2009/02/26/health/nutrition/26food.html